DAMNED GENTLEMEN INDEX

Page 77: It's a mess, aint it Sheriff?

If it aint it'll do till a mess gets here.

(all grammer sic)

The reason there's no quotations, and loose play with grammar, in the above is because McCarthy pretty much gives the finger to the rules of writing in this puppy. Quotes, commas, and most of their ilk are blown off altogether. Occasionally this makes for confusion, but I give him his due. It has turned out to be a reasonably smooth, swift read. If you like guys who swipe drug money from mostly dead henchmen, and then must flee the henchmen who come after the cash, then this book is your cup o' tea.

To The Last Man by Jeff Shaara May 06

Jeff Shaara followed in his dad's ass-kicking footsteps as an author. Most history books bore me unconscious, and 'historical fiction' writers go nuts on the fiction and forget the history. This kid knows his stuff and makes it a riveting read. If you think America's bumbling efforts in Iraq are a first, let Shaara show you how G. Bush the Younger is merely getting into the long and illustrious line of politicians who have repeatedly been the dumbest dumb ass in the War Room. This book re-affirms what we already know, that Europe owes us forever for saving their ass from the damned Germans...twice. To The Last Man covers the first time, WW I. A great read.

Year of Wonders by Geraldine Brooks June 06

I am always a little leery of chick writers, but this thing was laying around. It's about the Plague of the 1600's coming to a little village and, of course, wrecking havoc all around. I wasn't too far into it, and I figure that Anna, the housemaid/protagonist, ends up hooking up with the priest. This is common chick author territory. Everyone is always hooking with everyone else, even in a time of plague. Also no big surprise, every guy in the book is either stupid, a brute, or is otherwise inferior to the brilliant strong willed women who litter the landscape. If you're a girl who needs ego stroking, waste your money. For the rest of you, don't.

Ballad of the Whiskey Robber by Julian Rubinstein June 06

'A true story of bank heists, ice hockey, Transylvanian pelt smuggling, moonlighting detectives, and broken hearts'. That's quite the subtitle, but this puppy delivers on all counts. The story of a Hungarian criminal that would seem contrived if it was fiction, this is a read with plenty of suspense as it is. Read this book, or be sorry you didn't.

Hugh Hefner, the original damned gentleman, is a fine icon to rank the books I read. Five Hefners is the best possible ranking, while one Hefner means it's just rank..

Ben Franklin by Julie Mars July 06

While blowing a $50 gift card at Barnesandnoble.com, I found myself with a dollar and change left. I stumbled across this book, which I believe was 99 cents. What could possibly go wrong ordering a 99 cent book? Nothing, really, but it is kind of funny that the picture to the left is LIFE SIZE. That's right, if I ever get sent to a Turkish prison, I can easily 'smuggle' in this tome that biographizes one of our nation's finest. That and my baseball card collection.

Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer July 06

This book tested my ADDness, and thus I couldn't finish it. It does, however, expose the founder of Mormonism (Joseph Smith) as a lying, polygamous douchebag. Who in the hell would be gullible enough to follow such an obviously self-serving asshole? Oh, that's right, Mormons. If you are a Mormon of any stripe, read this book and abandon your stupid cult/religion. Mormons are such tools.

Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas by Dr. Hunter S. Thompson August 06

I have read this book several times and still love it. For sheer balls, it's hard to top the good doctor. This is the real story of a generation, unlike that piece of shit On the Road by that boring jackass Jack Kerouac. Thompson is reputed to have shot Linda Ronstadt's poodles when she lived next door. Man, do I ever hope that's true. Shooting is the only thing poodles are good for anyway.

Misquoting Jesus: The Story Behind Who Changed the Bible and Why by Bart D. Ehrman September/October06

I just started this book, but I've always been interested in how someone could try to foist a book, translated through several languages and from copies of copies of copies we don't have of originals we don't have, onto the world with the audacious claim that it is the indisputable word of God. This guy has a holy roller background, but says early on that his quest for the truth is not limited to Divinity.

I couldn't finish, it's too dry. But I read enough to satisfy my rightness about the Bible being hopelessly corrupted, even if it were based on real history. Which it isn't.